how to be a good hostess

Always seat visitors at the kitchen table. The dinette is conveniently located just inside the back door, the entrance everyone uses. (If the front bell rings, it must be a stranger. Ignore it.)

Don’t offer to take your guests’ coats. Even the youngest knows to hang hers on the back of a chair. If there are not enough seats in the kitchen, walk to your unused dining room and grab extras. Move these yourself so that guests are not put out, even when they offer to help.

Refreshments are unnecessary. Conversation will sate all appetites. During the holidays, however, share cut-out cookies or offer popcorn balls that previous guests have delivered.  If your current guests have brought their own Christmas treats, remind them that they shouldn’t have because how can a widow possibly eat all of this by herself?

Seated in the kitchen, your grandniece can spy the door to your basement. While the grown-ups talk, she can imagine what lurks down there and wonder if you ever venture into that secret space. She will also speculate on the layout of the rest of the house, rooms shrouded in mystery that she has never seen.

As she gets older, share clippings from The Wall Street Journal and Time magazine that you have been saving on the kitchen counter for her. Talking about the articles will make her feel smart and distract her from musing on your home’s floor plan.

When arthritis ravages your joints and confines you to a recliner, rely on your nurse to escort your now grown-up visitor to your living room. She will see how shrunken you have become within the context of your rather ordinary home.

She will miss sitting in the kitchen.


10 thoughts on “how to be a good hostess

    1. I’m glad you found more depth on a second reading. I’ve been working on this for a while thinking I would send it in to “Dead Housekeeping,” but I couldn’t get it to work within their submission guidelines. Definitely not my usual style.


    1. Thanks. I was glad I went back and re-read the guidelines when I needed to check the word count limit. I realized it wasn’t quite right, but I enjoyed trying something new.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. monkey enjoy story. why. here why. it smart but not cute. it thoughtful but not try too hard. + it exercise simple brain of monkey in pleasant way.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. With this piece, you made my heart yearn for my great aunts, who never pretended to be anything they weren’t and loved me unconditionally without doting on me. Thank you for a fine piece of writing.


    1. I always remember the shock of realizing my great aunt was my grandmother’s sister. They were so different from each other, each strong in her own way.


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