It’s been two years since Philip was formally diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. For the past three weeks, I’ve been revisiting and sharing the blog posts I wrote about the process at the Yeah Write Moonshine Grids. Re-reading the posts has been an uncomfortable experience for me, especially the final one in which I reported on the results.
Two years ago, I was afraid. I suspected that Philip was autistic, so having him evaluated and getting the results would only confirm “my worst fear.”
My worst fear?
Yes, I had been conditioned to think that autism was horrible. I wanted to get a diagnosis so that I could get services for Philip that would help him be less autistic.
Fortunately for Philip, there are autistics and parents that share their stories who have made me realize that I don’t need to fix Philip. I need to fix the way that the world looks at him.
If it weren’t for those blog posts that I wrote two years ago, I would probably have forgotten most of the particulars of the process. I also would have conveniently forgotten my own negative attitude.
But there is one detail that I’ll never forget. We had endless forms to fill out. There was also a form that Philip’s preschool teacher had to complete. In addition to checking boxes, there was a narrative section. I’ll always remember what she wrote there:
Philip is easy to love.
Tomorrow, some of the bloggers that I mentioned before, the ones that helped me learn to accept Philip as he is, will be presenting a flash blog called “Love Not Fear.” It is a fitting act for Valentine’s Day because what his teacher said is true: Philip is easy to love.
If you’re curious, here are the links to the posts that I wrote about the autism screening process: